The only thing on my mind prior to surgery in 2021 was, “Please God, don’t let it be cancer”. Although I had the CA125 test, which showed mildly elevated numbers, in my mind, this was my worst case scenario reality. My mind always goes to the worst case and starts to prepare for possible outcomes.
I woke up from surgery in very little pain, and my Dr. did give me the magical words that it was not cancerous. Thank you, God! However, he confirmed it was endometriosis, and that it was so bad he had to completely remove the ovary, as an endometrioma had formed around the ovary and was so large and complex he felt the ovary wasn’t viable anymore. He also confirmed that he removed adhesions, and that my uterus was retroflexed, which is known to cause pain, but also that my remaining ovary was “frozen” onto the back of my uterus. I didn’t know what any of this meant at the time, and I honestly took it as great news- NO cancer!
I was incredible naïve about my condition at this point in my journey, and I truly regret not looking into it further or pursuing treatment earlier on. Ladies, your health is THE most important thing, you were given this one body to care for, nourish it and listen when it tells you something is wrong. We don’t have to put on a face and be tough or disregard our aches and pains because we feel like our families need us. Early intervention with endometriosis is so very important. But again, had I known then what I know now… I wouldn’t be telling you this story.
I recovered well from surgery, was able to get back into exercising, and thankfully my pain wasn’t too awful for about 6 months after the procedure. I did do a little reading on my condition, and realized that mostly what doctors recommend for severe endometriosis, would inevitably be more surgery. But I wasn’t to that point yet. I still wanted to continue trying to conceive. I didn’t realize at the time how hard that would be with one functioning ovary… which was “frozen” to my uterus.
The sadness and disappointment really started to consume me, month after month of negative pregnancy tests. I still remember the excitement and anticipation anytime I was late, I swear I should have taken stock in Clearblue. There are so many of us out there who suffer in silence with infertility, while people in our lives continue on having children, and although we are happy for them, we can’t see past our grief.
Grief. Disappointment. Anger. Resentment. Jealousy. Confusion.
All of these emotions set in, I was consumed. To the point where if one more person shared pregnancy news, I was going to lose my Sh*t.
I started to dig into my diagnosis at this point, and what I found shocked me. Infertility because of endometriosis is quite common… with few treatment options.
We were 7 years into our quest for “conception”, and after I read more and more about endometriosis, I began to slowly realize, my first and only daughter, really was my “miracle baby”. So many women with this condition have been unable to successfully conceive once, without treatment.
It’s important for me to mention that it IS possible to conceive with endometriosis, some women do require certain hormone treatments, and/or IVF, or even surgery to remove the adhesions, which gives them better chances of conceiving.
If you are a woman who has been diagnosed with endometriosis, I urge you to seek the medical care of an Endometriosis Specialist. I did not know that they existed! I trusted my OB GYN, but I now realize, how I could educate him on Endometriosis at this point in my life. There was so much he didn’t tell me, that he didn’t know. Don’t solely rely an on OB GYN to manage your symptoms. It wasn’t until I found a endo specialist, that I actually got answers. Specialists are trained on treatment options and laparoscopy excision surgery that will remove the endometriosis (even if for a time), so that you can have more success in conceiving. This is one of the valuable pieces of knowledge that I wish I had, before my salpingo-oophorectomy.
EmpowHer 
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